The Storm and the Sun

As I waited to give birth to my son, there was a lot of talk of "the calm before the storm". I can now describe a little about the storm. The first few days were kind of rough. Beautiful, magical, and rough. First, there's just the physical recovery. Let's face it: They don't call it "labor" for nothing. :) I've also experienced what 80% of women experience: the baby blues. And I've realized that they have nothing to do with mental instability and everything to do with circumstance. Sure, your hormones are a little crazy, but more than anything, you're just so sleep deprived, you get weepy. And when that sleep deprivation comes from a new baby, you also feel overwhelmed. You get a little scared that you'll never sleep well again. And, you get a little lonely, because no matter how beautiful your baby is, he can't talk to you or reassure you or even listen with understanding to what you have to say. I cried in the middle of the night at first when Wyatt had his days and nights mixed up and wouldn't sleep for hours at a time. I would sing to him through tears. I've been a chubby, weepy, physically less-than-completely-healed mess. And so, I experienced some stormy weather.

Now for the sunny weather. We discovered that if we keep Wyatt awake and stimulated as much as possible in the evening, and give him a sponge bath before bed, he seems to associate night more with sleeping. And so, last night, he slept for two blocks of three hours each. That gave me almost 6 hours of sleep. Six hours. I felt like a new human being this morning. I had energy. I enjoyed every moment with my son. I got dressed in one of the cute tops Ryan picked up for me when I realized I had nothing that felt right for the postpartum bod. It's amazing how much sleep can effect your outlook on life!

Oh, and here's the kicker: I weighed myself this morning. And although I still weigh more than I ever thought possible, I was excited to see that I've already lost 17 pounds in 6 days. 10 pounds since I've been home from the hospital. And I know there's still more water weight that'll come off pretty fast because I still have cankles and puffy feet. It's pretty nice to know that my starting point for the long journey to a pre-preggo body is going to be a little lighter than what I'd assumed. Don't get me wrong. It'll be a lot of work. But every pound that drops off now is one less I'll have to lose later. And that, my friends, is true sunshine.

Here are some new pics of the little dude: