Monday, October 19, 2009

Mommy Meets Judge and Jury

And then it was Fall. I guess this blog is seasonal. So, anyway... The monkey is now almost 19 months old. He's a rascal. Adorable? Heck yeah. But a RASCAL. Ha. He climbs shelves to get to "out of reach" coffee cups. He then drinks said coffee, spilling half of it on himself and the couch. He pulls bottles of wine out of the wine fridge. He pulls outlet covers out of their plugs. Basically, if he can climb it, knock it over, throw it or snatch it, he will. He is an evil genius and an angelic whirlwind. He is a toddler. And as far as I can tell, even with all that, compared to a lot of tykes out there, he's a really good kid.

And, as it turns out, this is also the age by which parents are judged. This is where people watch you intently to see how you'll handle the latest bit of toddler terror. This is where your family is suddenly public property. Discipline is at the forefront of conversation, and even the most gray minded people you know become apostles of the black and white. Their way or the highway. It makes me mad. But I think I just need to let it go.

Here's what I know: I care about the character of my child. I don't want him to be spoiled, nor do I want him to be opressed. I'm pretty sure that it's my job to teach my son about responsibility. About community. About faith. About consequences and rewards. About real life; not bubble life. And I'm going to do that in the way my husband and I have agreed upon, even if it's not in perfect alignment with the world's latest "only way" parenting craze. Child psychology is great. Sure. But the philosophies change with every generation. One guy writes a book and suddenly last year's wisdom is thrown out the window. New is better. It's shiny. I wonder what new study will overshadow everything we know today? I guess we're all kooks to somebody. So, yes. I have strong opinions about raising MY son. I promise not to inflict them on you. Just do me a favor and give me the same respect. It's none of my business whether you use time outs or lollipops or spankings or distractions or a mix of all of the above. I'll save my concern for the truly unwanted. The truly abused. The truly neglected. I'm just glad you love your kid enough to parent. That's pretty awesome.
Thumbs up. You're doing a good job. Ignore the snide look from the know-it-all in the corner. :)